Struggling Through Singleness 

I’m just going to start out by saying, my heart is in a weird place right now. It’s stuck somewhere between trying my best to be content waiting on God, and anxiously wanting so many things to happen at once. Lately, I’ve really been struggling with my season of singleness. I mean, to be quite honest, it’s not even a season. I’ve been single my entire life. I never did the whole “teenage dating scene.” I had my share of crushes in high school, but none of them ever went past the point of me liking a guy, and him not even knowing I existed. So, to say that my heart is getting to be a little impatient, is kind of an understatement.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for waiting on God and trusting in His timing, but sometimes I wish I could give Him a little nudge and get the ball rolling a little faster. The thing that makes waiting even harder, is thinking that you know who He has set aside for you. When you let your head and your heart get comfortable with the idea of spending the rest of your life with someone, and it just doesn’t go the way you want it to, it tends to throw you into a funk. As difficult as it may be, that’s when you have to remind yourself that God has His absolute best planned for you, and you just need to stay out of it and let Him work.

I guess the thing is, I’m almost twenty five years old. I have baby fever like crazy, and I’m beyond ready to find a sweet, man of God to marry and settle down with. I want nothing more in life than to be a wife and a Mom. I want someone to love unconditionally that I can spend the rest of my life with. Someone who is closer to God than he is to me, someone to help me raise our kids to love the Lord with their whole hearts. I’m just ready. I’ll keep on praying, hoping, and waiting until that man comes along, because I know that God’s plans are far better than anything I could ever imagine. Even when its a struggle, we need to learn to hang in there and wait on God.

 

 

 

 

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Waiting for my Valentine 

To my Valentine,

I know you’re out there somewhere, and I like to think that you’re closer than I realize. Everyday I pray that you’re preparing your heart for me, as I am for you. The Lord is using this season of singleness to build us up and strengthen us in Him, so that as we do life together, we’re constantly encouraging each other and drawing the other closer to Him. I want you to love God more than you love me. I pray that we both learn from His love, and can find new ways to love each other through Him.

I’m giddy with excitement for the journeys He’s going to send us on, the people we’ll meet, and I can’t wait to see how He uses us for His Kingdom. When I find it hard to be patient, I just thunk about those things, and it makes the wait easier. I pray that we’re a power couple, on fire for Christ, being a blessing to those around us. I’m positive that doing life with you will be so beyond worth the wait, and I hope that you feel the same way.

They say that good things come to those who wait. Well, I’m here to tell you that I will wait for as long as it takes for God to decide when the timing is right. Waiting and praying and preparing my heart for you.

If you’re reading this, Happy Valentine’s Day, love.

Forever Yours,

Mandi

 

The Forever Valentine 

 

Will you be My Valentine?

I gave my life for you

I bled and died upon that cross

to give you life brand new.

 

Will you be My Valentine?

I’ll wipe away your tears

I’ll bear your every burden

and comfort you in fear.

 

If you’ll be My Valentine

I’ll be forever yours,

together for eternity

I’ve opened Heaven’s doors.

 

~Amanda N. Sams

February 14, 2016


“Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you.” 

Hebrews 13:5 

I Don’t Want to be Skinny.

Disclaimer: This is not a body shaming post, all sizes are beautiful and there’s nothing wrong with being skinny! This is strictly about MY body.

More than a Number

It’s currently about 12:15am, Sunday, January 3, 2016. I should be sleeping, but my thoughts are eating away at me, as I toss and turn. So, here I am, wide awake, trying to put them into words.

For the last year or so, I’ve been in and out of gym routines, healthier eating, no sugar, drinking smoothies like crazy, etc. But each time it has only lasted a couple of months, at most. I’ve struggled with body image on and off. I’ve had people tell me that I “would be a knockout” if I would just “lose a few pounds.” My determination kicked in, I gave up sugar, got out of bed before the sun to hit the gym, and I even started a running plan. I quickly realized that I was burning myself out, and my drive and motivation fizzled fast. I gave myself a break, hoping to get it back, but them I started really thinking…

Am I doing this for me?” “If I am, then why can’t I stay motivated?” “Or am I just doing this because of what others have said? Because “he” might like me more if I’m 80lbs lighter?”

I have a confession to make; I don’t want to be skinny.

For so long, I’ve felt the pressure of others to “lose a few pounds,” or “be a smaller size.” I’ve decided that I’m done making changes to my body because others think that I should. I’ve learned to rock the size I’m in, dress it properly, and appreciate my body for all that it is. And, ya know what? The right guy will love me no matter what size I wear!

I appreciate so much all of the encouragement I’ve gotten each time I’ve “embarked” on a new weight loss journey. I’m not saying that I’m going to cancel my gym membership and become a couch potato. Working out makes me feel great! I just don’t want it to become a priority over a good night’s sleep, or time with my family, etc. I’m definitely not going back to eating sugar like crazy either, yuck! I just want to be the healthiest version of me. If that means I lose a few pounds along the way, great! But I’m not going to wear myself out trying to get down to the “ideal” dress size.

My body is nowhere near perfect, but its perfect for me. I’m plus size, and proud! I’m done trying to be something that someone else wants me to be!

To My Lovely

  
  Hello love! 

  It’s been a long while since I wrote last, and you’ve been on my heart more now than ever! You’ve been into prayers constantly. I feel like you’re closer than you’ve ever been, and it’s honestly making me crazy to not be with you. I want to know who you are, I want to have you by my side. I want to overwhelm you with my love, to start doing life with you, to love Jesus together. 

  My heart is so ready for you! I sure do hope the Lord thinks that we’re ready for each other soon, too. I hope you’re praying for me as well. Believe me, my anxious heart needs it! Ha! I can’t wait to see what our future holds, but I know that it will be worth the wait! So, hang in there with me, and sooner or later we’ll be together for good. I already love you with all of my heart, dear! 

All of my love,

  Your Future Lovely 😘

Love Enough

  

When my heart gets tired of waiting,

I feel Your gentle touch

as You tenderly remind me

to stop worrying so much

 
You know the plans You have for me,

the man You’ve set aside

Your timing is always perfect

Your ways, much better than mine

 
Although I get impatient,

I may plead, and beg, and cry,

I know You know what’s best for me, 

and only Your Love can truly satisfy.

 
~Amanda N. Sams
July 5, 2015 

“Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, 

that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.”

~Psalm 90:14 (NIV)

*Conditions Do Not Apply

asteriskUnconditional love: affection with no limits or conditions, complete love. (Dictionary.com)

God loves you. Unconditionally. Forever, no matter what. You can’t make Him unlove you, ever. I love how the Message Bible translates Psalm 103:12.

As far as sunrise is from sunset, He has separated us from our sins.”

He has wiped them away, given us a fresh start. You don’t need to beat yourself up about a that mistake you made last year. Don’t punish yourself for your past wrong doings. God has completely forgotten about them. He sees you as His pure, perfect child.

Don’t let yourself get caught up in the *conditions apply mindset. The love of God doesn’t come with any catches. He just asks us to trust Him completely and know in our hearts that His plans are always better than ours.

“For God so loved the world, He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.” (John 3:16, NIV)

It doesn’t say “that whoever is perfect,” or “that whoever doesn’t have tattoos and piercings,” “that whoever hasn’t committed a crime,” “that whoever feels worthy.” Because of the Cross, because of the Blood, four nails, a crown of thorns, unimaginable pain, we’re all worthy of His love. Don’t continue to kick yourself for something God forgave you for a long time ago.

Whoever: whatever person, any person at all.

Any person at all.

God loves you, forever and always. To the world, we’re flawed and sinful. To God, we’re perfect, pure, and holy. Just put your life in His hands and trust Him completely, you won’t regret it.